How Santísima Muerte Led Me Back to Jesus

So, for background, I've been solely devoted to Santa Muerte for about 2 years now though She has walked with me all my life. Like most people who are called by La Muerte, I was always interested in death, horror, odd things, the occult and admittedly, I had a dark nature. (As I believe we all do or are capable of possessing when we are walking in an unbalanced way.) 

Growing up, I had a naturally more apathetic or cynical outlook on people and life because of what I experienced as a child. I felt like I had to "grow up" faster than most people. And that, I did, for better and for worse.

Anyway, fast forward into my spiritual practices - which is the cornerstone of my life...  Although I was leaning towards the darkness and eventually even went as far as being strictly on the left hand path - I was both equally interested in and afraid of Santísima Muerte. 

I didn't understand why, especially because I had already worked with other spirits that people deem just as "scary" or otherwise had a strong reputation for darker workings. However, there was just something about Santa Muerte that I knew was serious... and different.

I had a fear of offending Her or disrespecting Her from the jump, but the initial unease soon dissipated and made way for one of the most profound spiritual connections I've ever had in my life. As soon as I devoted to Her, not only did I feel Her presence right away, but She answered my prayers quickly. 

My first altar to Santísima Muerte was shabby and simple. I had just one beautiful bedazzled La Niña Rosa (the pink girl) statue and dare I say, She spoiled me silly. I would make it a ritual to give Her daily offerings of fresh water, apples, and whatever else She had requested from me. As a result, I was receiving so many gifts, so many compliments, a lot of money, and I was being bathed quite literally in love. 

Then La Niña Negra entered the picture and everything went to hell (and eventually back to heaven)... Nothing could have prepared me for the sheer spiritual force of the Lady of the Black Veils and the way that She flipped my entire life upside down.

What happened was this - I went to purchase a statue of Santa Muerte in Her rainbow robes from a well-known seller online and, lo and behold, when I opened the box, I had actually received the same statue but it was the largest La Negra I had personally ever seen.

I was intimidated, but nonetheless, I placed Her front and center on my altar. She went to work right away and I was confronted with the deepest shadows of my life including my religious wounds and religious trauma.

For the first time, I asked a family member for a Bible. Imagine their surprise, too, because last they knew, I was a witch for hire, so what did I truly want with a Bible?

Now, of course, due to my Hoodoo heritage, I did start by strictly using the Psalms for protection and cleansing works but over time, something 'strange' happened and I found myself growing a deeper curiosity in Jesus personally. I wanted to know who He was for myself and why His Name was so powerful. I especially felt this pull after I started incorporating the Rosary into my prayer life.

Once I made this personal decision to grow closer to Jesus, Santísima Muerte slowly but surely guided me by the hand and I started to do more Biblical research under Her wings. She taught me that She wasn't oppositional to the energy of God and that She, in fact, served Him. 

She let me know that Jesus was welcome at Her altar, along with His Blessed Mother Mary. And many devotees of Santa Muerte know that She does NOT share Her altar with any other spirits or saints, so it struck me as impactful. (I believe St. Jude and Jesus Malverde may be the other exceptions). 

As I grew deeper into my studies about Jesus and His Life, I was stunned by the sheer historical connections I came across. Then, on a personal level, as I began to read the Word, I felt the Bible held so many truths that I simply couldn't deny it anymore. Daily reflection on Scripture brought me so much peace and filled me up in a way that I could hardly explain. All I knew was, I had come a long way from reading grimoires and cursing my enemies and even though it was challenging to let my old identity go, I felt more free than ever before. 

Now, does this change suddenly mean that I'm perfect or a miraculous person? No, actually, my entire walk at this point has shown me that there's Grace in quite the opposite. Only when we are willing to admit that we are flawed can we truly invite the Love of God into our lives.

I have truly been given a new life, a fresh outlook, and most importantly - a faithful friend in Jesus because La Santa Muerte keeps me on my Ps and Qs when it comes to honoring the Lord.

I share all this to also say, thank you to Santísima Muerte for lighting the way along my path and thank you God for showing me that You are the Way.